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Facebook, Twitter Revolutionizing How Parents Stalk Their College-Aged Kids

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Facebook, Twitter Revolutionizing How Parents Stalk Their College-Aged Kids


It’s back to school season,
and for a lot of you out there, that means kids going back to college.
– Right. The networking
website, Facebook, is a great tool to help you keep in
constant contact with your grown kids. And here to show us how it all works is
Today Now’s own E-Mom, Gloria Bianco. Nice to see you.
– Gloria, good to see you again. Hi Jim, hey Tracy.
– Now you’ve all heard the term Facebook, but we may not know that you can use it to
keeps tabs on your children’s personal lives, even when they’re
far away from home. You can you’re gonna
love this, it’s so easy. All you do is
create a profile, and search for your son
or daughter’s name and add them to your list of friends.
– Oh OK. Within minutes you can
be writing on their wall, I write to my son Jeffrey
about five or six times per day. He must love being able to stay
in touch with his mom like that. Yeah.
– It’s a great way to remind him to take his psoriasis medication, or just to tell
him how much I love my little Jeffrey. That is really great. – The thing I
love about Facebook is all the photos. Yes.
– That’s my favorite part too. I look through all of my son
Jeffrey’s photos every single day. Do you really?
– Now look, I can see here that he’s with this young woman with a low
cut shirt showing a lot of skin, It looks like they’re
having a lot of fun. Girls like that like
to have fun. Now see here with the Facebook
feature called “tagging,” I can find out she is Jenny Longman
just by scrolling over her. That is neat!
– Wow. Now Facebook won’t let
me see her entire profile, but I can get a good
enough idea of what she’s like just by looking at this trampy picture.
– I’d say so. The other great
thing about tagging is that you can see pictures
of your kids posted by any of their other friends.
– Really. Now see here, here’s a picture of my,
– Oh sure. son at an event entitled “Jenny’s
Blazing Rager Dusk Till Dawn.” Here’s that young woman
Jenny Longman again. Oh, look at that. – Now, here’s
my favorite site of all, Twitter. It allows you to virtually follow your
son or daughter’s every move, you can hear their every thought
it’s like a dream come true. Hey that is great.
– Oh wow. Here’s my page, you just pick
a name that’s very common, and after you add the year
your son or daughter was born, and they’ll think it’s someone that
they graduated with. – Very clever. You can send them
messages all day long, they won’t even
complain about it. Just make sure that you
spell everything wrong and swear a lot.
– Right. And sometimes your child
will even respond to you. That’s great!
– It is great, because if you’re
thinking of driving up to your son or daughter’s college some night
just to watch them through the window, you’ll know if they’re around or not.
– Right, could take you a lot of time. Or if your son says he’s going
to go off snowboarding for the weekend
with someone named Jenny, you can send her a message
warning her to keep her slut hands off your son unless she wants to
find herself in some pretty big trouble. OK, so now the only excuse for not
knowing every detail of your child’s life, is having a life
of your own. Gloria, thank you so much
for being with us again. OK.
– And now get your glasses ready, because we’re going to
interview a war widow in 3D. Get those glasses out.

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100 thoughts on “Facebook, Twitter Revolutionizing How Parents Stalk Their College-Aged Kids”

  1. Bupdeeboowah says:

    Wow the number of people who think this is real

  2. That Guy says:

    its so true its scary

  3. GreenLightMe says:

    she made him check his tire pressure, lol

  4. cindybin2001 says:

    Lol, hilarious!

  5. WereBringingItBack says:

    DEAR JEFF,
    SUCK IT
    SINCERELY, ADAM

  6. Steve Carras says:

    I follow Amanda Bynes on Twttier(r),
    ergo=I know Amanda Bynes..:)(yes, it is sick, and thankfuylly for celebs so not truje)O

  7. Rafael Leon says:

    Stalker mom

  8. Nonaim Zallowed says:

    Good thing I don't have a Twitter or Facebook account to be stalked by.

  9. Modzw, says:

    This is sweet and charming to me…for some reason

  10. ummglick says:

    Only in amerika

  11. James Russell says:

    Fucking stupid americans

  12. phdan123 says:

    Oh sweet irony

  13. 0513will says:

    RIP Jim Haggerty

  14. Katherine Broderick says:

    Hetalia, unite!

  15. Garrett McMillen says:

    You people are messed up back off of your kids life before they decide to keep you out of it

  16. Bubblybradley says:

    next up mom gone wild now on animal planet

  17. natesdevices says:

    I guess you europeans don't have a very good grasp of satire, do you?

  18. natesdevices says:

    dafuq is wrong with you?

  19. BlackFlameSupremacy says:

    What cunty thing did I say?

  20. Wahukian says:

    lmaoooooooo "porno fuuuckd up my computr!"

  21. KingRobbStark says:

    Did anyone notice Adam Lambart on the facebook post?

  22. seeker jay says:

    these writers r good

  23. Stine Newton says:

    2:07 Pause it, read…..

  24. number1ukrainian says:

    is this video fake? its just too creepy

  25. number1ukrainian says:

    hahahahahah i can't stop laughing, he doesnt know its a mom and son convo

  26. FearfulChaos says:

    Why can't this be the official news source?

  27. Pagwon says:

    Same FRIENDSHIP HIGH-FIVE

  28. Nonaim Zallowed says:

    Actually, I made a Facebook a couple weeks ago. :/
    (Although my family doesn't know I have it, yet.)

  29. Pagwon says:

    FRIENDSHIP HIGH-TWO!

  30. Monchan says:

    0:53 Look at Adam's comment…LOLOLOLOL

  31. crazylilbuddy says:

    the first time i saw this a couple years ago i thought it was fake

  32. H. G. Wells says:

    BUT YOU DO HAVE A YOUTUBE ACCOUNT. HI HONEY!
    SMALL QUESTION: WHERE IS CAPS LOCK KEY?

  33. Nonaim Zallowed says:

    STOP IT MOM! YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME!

  34. TheMoctezuma86 says:

    I am so glad my parents think that facebook is too stupid to bother making an account. I avoid adding strangers as friends just in case

  35. everystar15 says:

    It's really sad how this is supposed to be a joke yet my mom is actually like this. No exaggeration.

  36. TheBigStupidHead says:

    porno fuckd up my computr lmfao

  37. Carlinda Green says:

    well thanks for the warning to everyone who has a facebook that maybe they should study their friend request before accepting them and to never accept parents. but my mom isn't like her at all. she said soo much about the girl but wasn't that your sun with his mouth open below her titty! and wasn't he the one starring at her boobs. OH i guess it was all her fault. you should have taught your son some damn self control… and the fact that you show us and admitted you threatened her. STUPID ASS!

  38. thee one says:

    Boo. this is all fake lol. it is satire. look at there other vidz, or research the Onion.

  39. Carlinda Green says:

    oh okay lord i been bout to say this some crazy shit.

  40. Del Taco James says:

    They're 18 leave them alone

  41. Maisie BG says:

    Its just called being nosey! if they r 18 there adults and they can take sontrol of their own lives!

  42. Matthew Sifuentes says:

    Lol it's fake the Onion is a parody website.

  43. Del Taco James says:

    I know… or knew lol

  44. jbmp1390 says:

    it's a joke. Christ

  45. TheRatesMusic says:

    have you looked in the jar on top of the fridge?

  46. Thegamerslife1 says:

    THIS IS SO GAY

  47. John Smith says:

    hey is this fake?

  48. mattias82sweden says:

    Like if you paused the video to read all the Facebook comments and tweets… xD

  49. Collins Khuu says:

    yeah it's the onion.

  50. dpsrbi says:

    ah dude! porno fucked up my computr!

  51. Christina Lacey says:

    I had to pause this video like 3 times to read all the comments and tweets Jeff's mom left. lol

  52. TheDreamsypher says:

    All onion news is fake. Please stop taking this seriously

  53. Cindi Parks says:

    "Just spell everything wrong and swear alot". So true.

  54. Mass Fireworks says:

    This trampy picture 😀

  55. dpsrbi says:

    ah dude!! porno fucked up my computr! LMAO

  56. Baby Irene says:

    So damn right. This is absolutley stunning writing and comic.acting. SNL hasn't done anything near this good or this relevant in years. Decades probably.

  57. Edmund Catlin says:

    I bet Onion bloopers are worth their weight in gold. 

  58. Harry Nguyen says:

    funniest shit ive ever seen

  59. Steve Leuniz says:

    The mom is just concerned with her son being so far away and on his own for the first time.  She is trying to be a good influence by befriending him as "CoreyS1990".  It's clever really because this way she can help him without him feeling embarrassed that it's his mom.

  60. Hoe Beaux Jeaux says:

    I deleted my Facebook a few years ago. them gays kept sending me friend requests I can let the ladies from my church see gays on my Facebook page. we need to pray for this country

  61. Sybel says:

    hahahahaha this is gold

  62. chancy319 says:

    "When he says he's gonna go off snowboarding with someone named Jenny, you can send her a message warning her to keep her slut hands off your son unless she wants to find herself in some pretty big trouble".

  63. chancy319 says:

    "So now the only excuse for not knowing every detail of your child's life is having a life of your own".

  64. ShinyArc says:

    Forgot the part where you spam Minion memes that make no sense

  65. Jefff says:

    My daughters are 6 & 2 and this gives me a lot of time to strategize on how I will keep tabs on them. I can post threatening messages on the wall of the guys in their photos and tell them that they need to stay away from them. I'll put a fake profile of a muscular guy with a black belt in martial arts.

  66. enip284 says:

    Omg the onion predicted kids leaving Facebook and why

  67. Lloyd Nix says:

    I wish my mom was like that, keepin me away from thots and making me check my tire pressure.

  68. tricityladytn says:

    "Now the only excuse for not knowing every detail of your child's life is having a life of your own." I see what you did there, Jim!

  69. jimmyredd says:

    "Get your glasses ready because we're gonna interview a war widow in 3D"

    lmao good lord

  70. Pete Smith says:

    I don't get adults having their parents as fb friends.

  71. Christobanistan says:

    Tracy is hot AF.

  72. Matthew says:

    "I h8 slutszzz dat smell like smoke.." LOL me too

  73. Serious Face says:

    It's not comedy anymore it's reality

  74. It's Me :/ says:

    All of this is real
    All of this exists
    This is not a joke taken to it's highest possible conclusion
    This is just something that happens

  75. SmashLiXs says:

    this was made before despicable me so it's not relevant enough without the minions

  76. Romanes eunt domus says:

    Just replace the word"child" with "ex girlfriend/boyfriend"

  77. My Answers To Everything says:

    “Girls like that like to have fun”

  78. Scotty D 5150 says:

    Man!! Tracy is the hottest!!

  79. yobro manson says:

    Visit the onion.com for tracking devices to implant in your child's skin. Nah I'm good, the vet already does that with a tag

  80. Kuala Rompin Bandar Blackout says:

    Cant wait fer weekensd!!!! 2 visit my mom.

    Every parent need to remember to do this once in a while 😀 Brilliant.

  81. ITPalGame says:

    E-mom, Imam?

  82. M A K O says:

    "can't wait for the wkend! 2 visit my mom!"

  83. Yahtzee Master says:

    this woman is crazy wtf, why are the hosts acting so casual about this

  84. ygazz says:

    this one is too good

  85. Nikhil Autar says:

    The comments are amazing. Worth pausing for.

  86. thegrimyeaper says:

    Jenny is all about those breasts.

  87. Vulcan says:

    Dear jeffey screw you adam

  88. sky bound zoo says:

    Look at that laptop. Amazing how far we came in a short time

  89. MCQ, Inc. says:

    "Fun, inflatable ape draws investors back to Wall Street"

  90. Justin Joy says:

    Jeff can go suck it.

  91. Mona Pizza says:

    Back when only college-aged kids used Facebook

  92. CrystaTiBoha says:

    Is it the Oedipal mom of mine that I cut out from my life years ago??

  93. Dead Juice says:

    Why does onion news always turn on captions? Is that me or for everyone?

  94. Ivan Pecenica says:

    This hurts man.

  95. urmomgeylol says:

    "SHIT! almost forgot my dAd's Bday tday, Anyone else gto yr dad's bday comeing up?"
    ngl incredibly accurate Karen

  96. Miguel Ruiz-Carpio says:

    This video is the reason why kids no longer use Facebook and Twitter 😂

  97. Jani says:

    A good mother recognizes a skank when she sees one.

  98. TheSnowFoxParty says:

    Yall haven't made a new video in 4 almost 5 months?!!!

  99. Lance May says:

    I dont think you should ever refer to a mom as stalking her kids.

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